The Beginner's Guide To Body Positivity

Like most women, there are some things I don't like about my body. My long limbs, body hair, barely there booty...it's a long list really. But, despite all my insecurities, I still love my body for what it is and not what "it should be." This wasn't always the case though. My teenage years were a rollercoaster of body image issues. I would want to look like Amber Rose today, be cool with my body tomorrow and be on a weight gain diet the following week. I was so obsessed with the idea of putting on weight to a point where I considered taking weight gain supplements. Luckily, my cowardice nature saved me from possibly harming my health. After reading up on the side effects of the supplements, I decided to abort the weight gain mission and save up for cosmetic surgery instead.

Long story short, I eventually learned to accept and love my body just the way it is during my self acceptance/ self love journey (which wasn't a walk in the in the park btw). Since body positivity is a topic that is so close to home, I've decided to centre my first blog post around it. The following tips helped me get through my body acceptance journey which in turn liberated me from working overtime in efforts to meet society's unrealistic body standards. I hope these tips help you just as much as they helped me. Before we get into the tips, I just want you to know that you're beautiful just the way you are. I know it sounds cliché but it's true. If you have any desire to change anything about your body, do just that. However, let it only be for your satisfaction and not anyone else's. Your opinion about yourself is the ONLY opinion that actually matters.

1. Don't let your mind bully your body

This is probably going to be the most difficult but most important step. Having negative internal dialogues is a sign that you're letting your mind bully your body. Your inner critique is a mean girl. She feeds of off your insecurities and negative thoughts. Don't let her bring you down with her negativity! Show her who's boss by growing only positive thoughts. This will be difficult at first but practice really does make perfect. Speak kindly to yourself. Speak your body positivity and acceptance into existence.  For example, instead of saying : "I hate my arms. They're so long and hairy." I would say: "My arms have helped me carry out so many tasks. Twisting out my hair before bed, taking selfies and hugging my loved ones." This helped me focus on the positive things I liked about my arms and made the negative seem irrelevant. It felt weird, and pointless at first but I got used to it eventually. Also, our body parts were designed with the purpose of performing specific functions. Legs to walk, eyes to see etc. Who said they should be a specific shape and size? What is the reasoning behind this? I'll wait.

2. Take care of your body

Taking care of your body is proof that you love it. Your body shows you love by carrying you through daily life. It's only fair that you return the favour. Shower regularly, shave if you want to, moisturise, drink sufficient water...ANYTHING! Do it because it's good for your health and not in efforts to alter your natural body shape. Exercising helps your body produce endorphins, which are hormones that improve your mood. Be mindful of your food intake. Ingest foods that boost your energy levels. You have a life to slay. You'll need all the energy you can get sis. Taking care of your body can be difficult if you've let yourself go so start small. Wear something warm during cold weather to avoid catching a cold, get enough sleep...anything that expresses that you love and care for your body, no matter  is good enough. When you look good, you feel good. When you feel good, you do good.

3. Cut off all sources of negativity 

Eliminate everything that disturbs your body positivity journey. You're already working hard to change your mentality. The last thing you want to be responsible for is changing other people's mentalities as well. Cut off everyone one who makes you feel insecure about your body. You don't need that kind of negativity in your life. I agree that we shouldn't depend on other  people's opinions to feel good about ourselves but having a positive support system will make your body acceptance journey a whole lot easier. Cutting off negativity also includes unfollowing certain social media  accounts. This includes fashion accounts that don't promote clothes for your body type (since this could make you feel that your body type is not fashionable), dieting accounts, extreme workout accounts...anything that makes you wish your body was different.  Yes, cutting off certain people will be difficult but it has to be done. Your peace and happiness depend on it.

4. Hype Yourself 

Again, your inner critique is a mean girl who just needs some love to come around. Compliment her outfit, hair, thighs, anything that will make her happy. Words are very powerful. DO NOT speak negativity unto your life. Start growing positive thoughts by using affirmations and kind words towards yourself. Hyping yourself will also help you stop looking for validation. I mean sis, when you KNOW your outfit is fire you won't need anyone to confirm. Admire your reflection when walking past shop windows at the mall. Look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself that you're beautiful. You will soon start realising that you ARE beautiful. You can also try setting positive and affirming reminders on your phone. I've been doing this for some time now and it puts a smile on my face all the time. It's so refreshing to see the reminder pop up on my phone when I least expect it.

5. Fake it till you make it 

It all sounds easy but it will definitely take some time. Body acceptance and positivity is a journey. Some days are better than others. You won't be motivated everyday so learning and practicing discipline is the only sustainable method. There will be bad days, many of themr, you shouldn't give up. Wear that miniskirt that "isn't for your body type." As a matter of fact, wear whatever you want to. The "dress for your body" narrative is exhausting. Wearing clothes that enhance your best features is a great idea. Not wearing certain clothes all in the name of dressing for your body however, isn't.  You might feel uncomfortable at first but like I said, practice makes perfect. Walk around with your head held high. Smile. You'll get there eventually sis.

I know that the tips are quite similar but I think they are all helpful in different ways. We are all different. There's no need for us to look the same. Don't be a slave to society's beauty standards. Define beauty for yourself. 

Please let me know what you think about my first blog post. Feel free to share your body acceptance stories as well. Take care.