While waiting in the queue at the bank last Friday, I heard WAP by Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion blasting from the queen behind me’s ringtone. Just as I was gearing up for a little impromptu twerk session in my head, she answered her phone and the vibe was over. That’s when it hit me: the City Girls are up and ready to take over the summer. Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you’ll know exactly who the City Girls are. JT and Young Miami have been making waves ever since their 2018 hit Act Up from their debut album Girl Code. Their music has empowered women to be unbothered – especially about these dudes – and live their best, carefree lives. Of course, as with most things women do, the term City Girl has become a social media punching bag, but guess what? The City Girls aren’t backing down. Want in on the movement? Keep reading!
According to the urban dictionary (and the song Act Up by the City Girls), a city girl is basically a woman who doesn't care about a man and is all about living her best life. Being a city girl isn't necessarily about hooking up with different dudes. It can be part of the deal, but it really doesn't have to be.
Being a city girl is more of an attitude. The "I don't care what you gotta say" kind of attitude. It's important to mention that city girls are also about living a soft life so they're definitely about their paper. Here's how you can become a city girl:
1. Be unbothered
Remaining unbothered despite society bieng on your neck about ANYTHING and EVERYTHING 25/8 is a big flex. Society expects women to be performative. Women are expected to pretend to be perfect and comply with societal norms. We're expected to be smart but naive, fierce but timid and be opinionated but conformative. These contradictory ideas are proof that you should completely disregard societal norms and live life on your own terms.
Also, remember how being skinny and having a flat but was the standard of beauty just two decades ago? Just do you sis.
2. Look The Part
When you look good, you feel good. As much as being a city girl is more about attitude than anything else, looking good is still vital. Always look good and presentable because it will make you feel good. When you feel good, you do good.
Makeup
If you wear makeup, make sure you do it right. You can improve your makeup skills by watching tutorials on YouTube. Mink lashes are highly recommended as they can elevate your entire makeup look from basic to baddie.
You don't have to wear makeup from Mac. There are good quality drugstore products that can get the job done.
Hair
Whether you're a natural hair girl or a girl who prefers rocking 30 inch bundles with the bayeng, make sure your hair is cute. When your hair is cute, you're cute. Since it's summer and braids are trending again, get yourself a cute braids or faux locs hairstyle.
Nails
Acrylics are important, okay? They're especially important for exeggerated hand gestures when speaking. If acrylics aren't your thing, get your nails done in a way that suits you. A big part of being a city girl is doing things on your own terms.
Having your nails done means having your toe nails done as well. White toe nails are part of the city girls uniform. If you don't like white, get a colour you like better. Just make sure your toe nails look cute.
Clothes
Looking good also means wearing cute outfits. You don't have to wear the latest trends or wear designer clothing. Gucci, Birkin and Chanel would be nice but if you don't have the coins, do not despair. There are many affordable alternatives to opt for. Apart from the usual stores (Mr. Price, The Fix, Zara etc), there are online stores such as Superlist who usually have "dupes" for trendy designer items. Put yourself on to those instead.
Smell The Part Too
In her book How To Be A Bad B*tch, Amber Rose spoke about the importance of having a signature scent and her teachings have stuck with me since. Having a signature scent becomes part of your brand. It also makes you feel good. Again, when you feel good, you do good. How you feel inside will always show on the outside.
3. DON'T SETTLE
One thing about city girls is they DON'T settle. If a dude is acting shady and not giving you the princess treatment you deserve, delete his number and enjoy your summer babe. Or better yet, start talking to that homeboy of his that you've always found attractive. If you're not getting reciprocal energy from a friend, distance yourself. Cutting people off is difficult but where your well-being is concerned, do what you gotta do sis. Life is way too short to be putting up with mediocrity. Thank you, next caller!
Don't settle for yourself either. Check yourself when you're slacking off and do better. You deserve only the best from yourself as well.
4. Focus On Your Hustle
From finessing dudes to working a nine-to-five, city girls ALWAYS have a hustle. For example, if school is your main hustle, do your best get good grades. Whatever your hustle is, make sure you slay in it. This goes hand in hand with not settling. When you know you deserve nothing less than the best, you'll do your utmost best at everything.
Also, if your hustle is scamming these dudes, make sure you don't get caught. You're doing great sweetie.
5. Make A Baddie Playlist
JT and Young Miami didn't give us a baddie album for us not to listen to it. Femme rap is the perfect music for a city girl type of lifestyle. It's all about being unbothered, cute and getting the bag. Besides JT and Young Miami, you can also listen to Meg, Flo Milli, Kash Doll and Nadia Nakai - just to mention a few. Femme rap is uplifting and is a good way to make you feel like THAT girl. Get into it.
If you're interested in listening to my baddie playlist on Spotify, I'm summer rose on Spotify and the playlist is titled Baddie Central.
https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1Zui8KvPAJHkMXLwU2zUrw?si=LvdF-g-7QGySNKIJ9k4IqQ
6. Confidence Is A MUST
Confidence is probably the most important part of being a city girl. Living life on your own terms and being unbothered requires confidence. If you're not that confident, there's good news. Confidence is not an inborn thing. It is something that can be learnt over time. Here are a few ways to do that:
Focus on what you like about yourself instead of what you don't
We all have flaws and insecurities. The trick is not to let them control us and take over our lives. Instead of focusing on how how much you hate your teeth, focus more on how much you love your lips. Matter of fact, put some lipgloss on to enhance them and forget about your teeth. Focusing on what you love about yourself will stop you from dwelling on your flaws and bringing yourself down. If you can't think of anything you like about yourself, you're not thinking hard enough.
Stop Comparing Yourself To Other People
I know you've heard it a million times but I'm going to say it again because it's true. Comparion is the thief of joy. Comparing yourself to people you see on social media is especially damaging to your self-esteem. Seeing other people flourish and post the best moments of their lives will have you comparing that to your daily life. Don't fall for that trap. Unfollow, mute and block if you have to. Remember, own race, own lane, own pace.
Think Positive Thoughts
Positive self talk is very important. Your inner voice is the most influential voice in your life which is why it has to be positive. Speak kind words to yourself. Affirm yourself. It's okay not be okay sometimes though. You don't have to fake positivity. However, speaking negativiely to yourself, about yourself is not okay.
Fake It Till You Make It
As cliche as it may sound, fake it till you make it. Like I mentioned earlier, confidence can be learnt over time. It's not something that happens overnight. The good news is, you don't have to wait until you feel a hundred percent confident to become a city girl. You can start showing up as the confident woman you aspire to be and eventually, you will become her.
7. Have Fun!
The main idea of being a city girl is having fun. Being unbothered, confident and looking cute is part of that. Go out with your friends, invite them over for a sleepover, shoot your shot, listen to your favourite song a million times - just have fun...unapologetically! It's summer babe. Go out there and live your best life. Don't forget to wear your mask though.
If you've made it this far into the post, congratulations. You're officially a city girl! I've long made peace with the fact that EVERYTHING women do will always be questioned. The "confusion" about what being a city girl actually means is proof that our liberation as women is still under threat. The idea of women living life on their own terms threatens the patriarchy which is the only reason its gatekeepers are pressed.
To all the city girls, live your life sis. Being a city girl is a lifestyle. It's about living your life, the best way you know how. Doing what you're most comfortable with. Don't let the negativity associated with the term stop you from doing that. Remember, they only hate when they see you doing good and that's on...
Connect with me:
Twitter : @sijabulile__
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