Am I Next?

The past week has been emotionally draining for us as a nation. As much as gender based violence has always been a serious matter, Uyinene Mrwetyane's rape and murder sent shockwaves across the country. When I started my blog, I wanted it's main objective to be woman empowerment, as well as other matters regarding women. However, I don't have the strength to write much about this very sensitive matter. Not because I don't have anything to say about it, but because I feel powerless. I feel as though nothing I have to say about gender based violence will be helpful in any way. I feel as though there's nothing I can do to help any woman, not even myself. However, considering my blog's objective, not writing anything about the current situation would be unjust.

Always keep your location on
Buy pepper spray
Download 'Namola'
Buy yourself a taser
Don't travel alone

All this until when? 

I'm not only angry, I'm also very disheartened by how most men have reacted to this uproar. From trying to discredit a whole movement by focusing on false rape accusations, to promoting the Not All Men movement at such a time! Before I turn this into a Men Are Trash post, I want to send my sincere condolences to Uyinene's loved ones. I also want to extend my condolences to all those who have lost their loved ones to gender based violence even before this uproar.

After rehearsing his speech as though he was preparing for a play at the theatre, the president announced that parliamentarians will be having a debate on whether the Sexual Offenders Register should be made public or not. Like most women in this country, I am hoping that they will decide to make it public. I don't think it will stop the violence. However, I am hoping that it will be utilised by employers when hiring people. That way we can have safer working environments.

To all the women who have experienced gender based violence, I am so sorry you went through that. I'm sorry you were asked questions that were intended to disregard what you went through.

What were you wearing?
Why did you go there alone?
Why did you go there in the first place?

I'm sorry that no one believed you when you spoke up. I'm sorry that you still relive what happened to you in your mind. I'm sorry that you still get triggered when you hear or read about people who have similar experiences.

To all the women who are now paranoid and anxious due to this scourge, I am so sorry. I'm sorry that you're always looking over your shoulder. I am sorry that you feel powerless, like myself. I am sorry that you feel drained emotionally by all the experiences that you've been reading about.

Until those in power decide to play their part, let us all support each other. Let us be each other's shoulders to cry on. The unfortunate truth is, we are on our own in this battle. We only have each other.

If you need my help regarding anything, please don't hesitate to ask.

Twitter: @sijabulile__
Email: info.lihlendlovu@gmail.com

Take care and stay strong. Staying strong is the only choice we have.